| Roman Orthodox Patriarchate of Simpson, PA | |
| Founder(s) | Himself |
| Autocephaly/Autonomy declared | 1975 |
| Autocephaly/Autonomy recognized | Not ever, by no one. |
| Current primate | ASDamick |
| Headquarters | Simpson, Pennsylvania |
| Primary territory | His Apartment |
| Possessions abroad | Guam, Virginia, Ohio, New York, North Carolina |
| Liturgical language(s) | Middle English |
| Musical tradition | Byzantine chant |
| Calendar | Wait... there's a calendar? |
| Population estimate | 2 |
| Official website | Andrew |
Where can I join? I tried to go to their website, but couldn't find anything, unless this means that you're not starting your own church :-) Fr. John
You've found my secret lab, I see. You realize, of course, that this means you'll have to be taken care of, "Byzantine style." --Rdr. Andrew
- I'll have my people talk to your people and we'll work something out :-). Fr. John